Being Sick

If there is one thing about me you should know, it's that I am a BIG ball of sickness. I get sick all the time. And I do mean all the time. There is not a month that goes by that I don't have a major headache, sore throat, or Im vommiting! AWESOME! It's been this way as long as I can remember. I am just not a healthy person and my immune system is always low enough for me to catch something. Right now I am enjoying the flu!!!! SO FUN. :) It started probably from Saturday night when some of our friends from Salt Lake came down for Halloween and we were up till 2 am. Then I just never caught up on my sleep and here I am now! Last night I had the MOST miserbale night of sleep in my life. I wish I could say I am exaggerating. But being totally honest, it was unreal how awful the night was. I could hardly swallow, and I was naseous. I took a blistering hot shower for more than an hour, yes more than an hour. No matter how hot it was I was still cold. I was so weak Scott had to help me out of the shower and help me put my hair up in clips. I decided not to take any Nyquil cause since I was sick to my stomach. I fell asleep and at 1 am my body ached so bad all over that I got up and layed on the couch. Lets just leave it there, and end with me saying I hope I never have a night like that again. Or at least for a long time.

Im just so good at getting sick! And Scott is never sick. He has never actually been sick one time while dating or being married, one of these times I would like it be him that sick and not me. Not that I want him to be sick, but he is always taking care of me, I would like to be the one taking care of him.

Lets go back now and review some of my favorite Holidays or special ocassions that I have ruined with being sick

1.Family Trip Disneyworld 2000-...Ok so this one is not my fault. My whole family was really sick and we all had the Stomach Flu, but I still feel bad cause it would be typical for me to be sick.

2. Thanksgiving 2007- I spent all night throwing up at my grandparents house right after Thanksgiving dinner. My sister Courtney was sick too, and we took turns throwing up into the same toilet. It was lovely.

3. Valentines Day 2010- So this one was the week before our wedding! Scott flew into Colorado for Valentines day and to help me drive and move all my stuff to Utah and we were supposed to go out for Valentines day, but the night before I was so sick from throwing up and I was sick for 3 days straight so 1, we didn't get to do anything for Valentines Day and 2, we left a whole day later than planned for utah. But hey...I did lose 7 pounds just in time for the wedding!

4. Our Honeymoon Feb 2010- On the 2 second day in of our Honeymoon in Cancun Mexico, I got Tonsilitis! joy! I was so miserable I couldn't swallow and I had a fever. The only thing I could take for it was mexican aspirin which did nothing. It was not treated until we got back to the US and we saw a doctor in the morning before our wedding reception in CO. I was still sick later that night for our reception and had a lovely raspy frog voice for all of our guests.

These are only a few of my favorites, Im sure there will be more to come.

cutest ever

So a texting conversation with my mom today went like this:

mom: "so the lady that bought your civic totalled it last night."

me: "oh no! sex kitten!"

mom: "she's in the cargrave yard now :("

me: "that breaks my heart."

mom: "that's how courtney felt. Maybe the cars will be together! :)"

me: "yes, together in car heaven."


ok My mom is the cutest thing ever. period.

running on empty

So this morning I woke up 30 minutes later than I normally do. I have to be at work at my preschool at 8:15 every morning. Actually it's 8:00 every monday because we have prayer meeting with all the teachers(which I manage to forget every week)and I didn't roll out of bed till about 8:05. I immediently started moaning and whimpering at the idea of going to work, and usually that doesn't happen. I have 2 of the best jobs in the world, I teach children all day, and do make-up. I couldn't ask for more. But getting out of my bed seemed more dreadful that normal. I was annoyed. I didnt do my hair, I threw some pop tarts in the toaster -which means I was obviously taking care of my figure- and half-arsed-ly put on some powder, threw together the most heinous outfit, and left. On my way to work I felt pressure on my brain. Kind of like if it pushes any harder it might just squish it from the weight.

I felt pure hatered for my life and everything and everyone in it. (haha dramatic much?) and then just started bawling. I had my husband call me and I just sat in the parking lot and cried to him "I don't wanna go to work! I don't wanna! I'm so tired, I'm so tired of this! boo who who who who. I can't do this anymore, It's just Im so tired! I just want to go back to bed!"....This carried on for a few minutes and honestly I had no shame, I sounded like the echo of a 4 year old who is cranky as all hell, and needed an afternoon nap. After I realized what I had just done, I was horrifed even with myself. What the heck was that all about?

Now to clear up how this all came about. Life has been moment after moment work for Scott and I lately. We are ALWAYS busy. We are ALWAYS doing something. We are probably the busiest people out of all of our friends we know (except for maybe Ben and Callista who live hectic lives as well). Scott has to work full time. He gets up at 5 in the morning, every morning and goes to work. He works everday till 2. After he gets off work, he has school. Sometimes at 2, sometimes at 4, sometimes at 5. But no matter what time, he still has to squeeze in his studying and tests. We usually only see eachother for an hour or 2 a day. I work every morning at 8. I work till 12:15. And then I go to school every night from 5 till 10 pm. In between 12:30 and 5 I get things done; errands, cleaning, whatever I need to get done in the time frame...most of the time I am not home. Then I am scheduled every weekend at Macy's where I usually work a full 8 hour shift. But this Halloween weekend I had the pleasure of being scheduled all day Friday and all day Saturday, 8 hours. I had no day off this week. On the weekend when we can find some time we try to fit in dates, hanging out with friends, social events, anything else that is planed into our lives. And when I'm not doing that I am usually beating my self up with bat about how I am not good enough...not a good enough wife, not a good enough friend, not GOOD enough. (I am my harshest critic)I try to do it all, I am a perfectionist in a lot of things and if it is not perfectly how I want it, then I have failed and I let myself have it. I do not give myself a break, I do not relax. And I really need to learn that concept.

But all in all I am realizing that although we are well balanced in our lives with a wide variety of school, work, and friends, there is just too much of all of it.
I don't want to seem like I am just complaining about my life. I love my life. I enjoy it. I love my family, I love my close friends, I love my husband and I am so blessed, but I have realized you can only run your car on empty for so long before it just breaks down. It is nieve to think a car will run on no fuel. I knew that doing what we were doing was going to be hard, working full time and school for both of us, but its just harder than I expected. And the worst part about it is I hold it all in. I don't tell ym friends. When I get overwhelmed I just hide away. My friends don't see me. I hibernate. I don't talk to them, I just get angry. The only person who gets the lashings of inner feelings vomit is Scott and then he gets the pleasure of also carrying my burden. I have a hard time coming out about what im feeling personally, I have a hard time opening up if I don't trust you. I close myself off and alot of time people think its them, its not them. It me. I just need a good friend right now, someone who just wants to sit with me and listen to me cry. I need to cry bad. haha

Im overwhelmed. We could use a break. I think we need some us time. We need some alone time...


Basically we need a vacation

...but first, a nap for the 4 year old :)

Blessing Board

So the other day I decided to make this ADORABLE craft i saw on a craft blog i follow. It was called a blessing board, and im going to show you how i made mine. :)
First of all i went to Hobby Lobby and got these things:
-1 yard burlap
-3/4 yard fabric of your choice
-buttons
-long vertical frame with glass (i actually bought this one at ross, but i suggest finding one at a thrift store...i couldnt find one though)
-letter stickers, with numbers

So I started off by taking out the glass of the frame and cleaning it really well. If the frame is not the color you want it to be, then just paint it. I took out the back of the frame and put it on top on my burlap, lining it and then cutting it out to match the shape of the backing. I then hot glued to corners to the back.



I cleaned the glass and then I put the word Blessing across the the top outside of the glass (I used lined paper to help me keep my words and numbers straight). You can put Count your Blessings, but since my letters where bigger I just decided to put Blessings. Then i took my numbers and numbered them down the side of the glass. It was supposed to go to 10, but I ran out of room cause my frame was small to begin with. After that I replaced the back of the frame with the burlap on it to the frame, so you can see the numbers and letters on the burlap back.







after that it was time to make my flowers. I took cups from my kitchen and traced around them on the burlap. I got one small cup and one large cup and then a few measuring cups. I used the smaller measuring cups to trace circles on my fabric that I got. After I traced and cut out my circles, I got my burlap circles and put a little hot glue in the center of each one, and then squeezed it together in the middle to form a flower. I also did this with my smaller fabric circles. (note!!! wait for the glue to cool a little before squeezing it. it will burn you if you do it right after!)




I then took my little fabric "flowers" and glued it to the top of a larger burlap flower. after it was dry I took a button and glued it to the to of the fabric. Then I hot glued the flowers onto the edges of my frame.



Then Scott and I took turn writing out some of the blessings we are thankful for right now :)...


cute huh?

Conference weekend getaway

Over General Conference weekend we decided to go up to Huntsville (where Scott's parents live) they have a horse ranch up there, and we invited our dear friends Ben and Callista Welling. We had so much fun hanging out with them and being able to see Scott's parents and sisters. It's really nice to go up there every so often, it's just really peaceful and you can just relax.

Here are some pictures from our trip






we played a game of twister, couples, and then boys and then girls. **im not very good at twister lol







after we went outside to ride the horses, but gypsy one of the horses was really sick! she wouldn't stand up and she just laid there and moaned and kicked her legs. we were really really worried about her, but it turned out that she had just eaten too much alfalfa hay and she got a stomach ache, so she was a lot better after she got drugged up by the vet! POOR GYPSEY! Aside from the horsey being sick, it was a really fun weekend! we love our friends, thank you Ben and Callista for spending the weekend with us :)

Sad about Halloween

So Halloween is coming up soon and I have a dilema. I have no idea what to be. Usually im think of girl who plans her costume the day after halloween for the next year...seriously. But this year has been so crazy i have hardly had time to think about it. but here it is...coming up quick and i have NO idea what i want to be. This might be sad to say, but honestly since being married and having to be modest has pretty much sucked the fun right out of dressing up for me. not that i was super revealing before, but just that now im super limited in what i can wear just cause all women's costumes are "sexy" and basically underwear, they dont really make "garment friendly" costumes unless you are a nun. so here i am almost wanting to forgo halloween, my favorite holiday all together, and i dont wanna do that. so tell me...what should i be this year? :)

Hair I have been doing

A couple weeks ago I was able to do a girl named Brittany's hair and make-up for her bridal photos. It was so wonderful and she looked just beautiful, but before I did it I practiced on one of my doll heads at home and tried out some looks i liked :)